In case any of you wondering, guess I haven’t found time writing these days, more cos I wanna hold my head from using this blog as an innocent channel to defend myself. It’s a wonder why I tend to end up defending myself when I (honest to God) merely tried to be a good news reporter when I started a posting. (oh, shut up!). But lots of weird things in my life do need explanation good friend.. n who’s better to do that than the person in question? =p Anyway guys, here it goes my ‘thoughts’.
In ’bout couple days .. I kinda hope I am about to make a decision that’s supposed to bring a gradual change in my life, or at least that’s what people told me when I bother sharing them (withe extra comment I think it’s better not to mention here).
A decision which process has wasted several years of my life, trying to make it as suitable as possible for everyone, and by everyone I meant my family.
But life has been tick-tocking so frickin’ loud lately, and I still can’t get over my head yet on how to make it more favorable than it already would have been even from 4 years ago.
So then again, I figure if there was one person in this life that should fight for my happiness, it should be me, right?
So I guess this is an apology, for some people I do love more than anything.. whom I want nothing but seeing me always in sight of pride. (which I some time fail, with damage I may never be able to repair). For those hands I wish would still hold my stubborn head whenever I shake, whom I wish never to see myself fail and fall in front of them. (I did, and yes it hurt). I am sorry.
Life has taught me quite bit more than what it does to most 26 years old I know, and one lesson I bet would stick long enough in my head. is how you should always set things right for yourself first, before you go and try fixing others’ heart.
I’ve found this is sometime the only way things will fall at their own places, in a perfect order they were meant to. I’d like to believe that’s just how universe works.