Of all the reason people want to make their life easier to live in, I think peace in our mind is one thing we all strive to get a hold of.
There are so many moments, yet another crazy morning, when having to wake up and face this other day seems harder and harder to do.
Yet, funny thing is, we somehow always wake up, and find those mornings magically turn to nights.
These past 3 months, I have been myself not-living per se; and all those plan I had as a new student, just doesn’t taste as sweet as I thought it’d be.
It turned out planing to go back being a student is really, really a not so bright idea. Having to push myself to wake up every other morning just seemed like too much struggle.
My husband would have been the one who should get all due credits for making me stand up on my feet somehow and go through every single day. So, yes, it has been damn hard, for both of us.
How do I know this?
You will to when your three months of fighting somehow accounted more than those past 7 years before. Yes, we did it, and hopefully we learned a thing or two bout surviving a marriage, with these much of twist as ours
Anyway, next November probably will be ‘the going home’ time hopefully (at least for me), since Zuber got himself a confirmation of relocation to Jakarta, and we kinda decided it would be best for us both, considering all the crazy things been happening lately, (not to mention my health condition that just got worse when I am here in Bangalore).
So we are now cancelling the whole plan of my going-back-to-school, and instead packing up our bags, with 2 kgs of mustard and jeera, and as many as those herbs I can pack in my suitcase since I just dont know where to find in Jakarta yet.
Why am I writing this, you ask? Again, it’s my blog.
But to answer you; I am not quite sure. I guess I just need to somehow calm myself down from those strikes of guilty conscious. Maybe?
Life is short, and I should be entitled for some kind of happiness, as should every one else. God knows I tried my very best to make it happen in here itself, where my husband doesnt have to chose me among one of many obligation he needs to fulfill, being only son in Indian family and all.
It’s not like we will never be going back. (Zuber even made me promise to spend 2 years top in Jakarta, and re-settling in Bangalore when things get a bit easier for us). By easier, it means ‘people’ can start accepting me better.
So, I guess we both will all be just fine.